My friend’s boyfriend is asking me to be to be his side chick. What do I do?

Hi Roxxy,

I’ve been friends this girl.
We stopped talking in high school but recently started talking again.
She’s not really my friend but her boyfriend keeps asking me to be his side chick
What do I do?

Dear Anonymous

Ahaaaa the classic love triangle, I think all females in one way or the other have been entangled in similar situations, the real question here though, is WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

You’re probably considering it because you may be curious, and as you said before you guys are not close friends. Don’t worry, there is no judgement here, what I’ve learnt throughout my experiences in life is that; everything is not always in black and white and not every advice is tailor made for every situation regardless of how similar these situations may be. Especially since I do not know all the full details so I can’t really tell you what to do but, I can highlight on a few points I’ve observed in your question.

I see the guy you’re referring to has emphasized that he wants you to be a side chick/side piece/3rd wheel/extra and he has made it clear to you that he will not leave his girlfriend but wants to have both sides of the pie, i.e. you and the gf. Are you really ok with being the other girl? Because side piece simply means that he wants nothing more from you than sexual favors, or he wants to date you in secret whilst he parades around his official girl to the general public. Would that be enough and are you ok with sharing? I think that you need to evaluate who has more to gain from this arrangement, and who has more to lose.

You also referred to this girl as your friend, even though you also said that you are not that close you still acknowledged her as someone whom you know well. Is having a lil fun with this guy worth risking your friendship which you’ve only just recently started to build up? And if somehow she finds out, who do you think will face the most backlash? Who do you think she will side with, blame or believe? And are you prepared for that? Are you willing to lose that friendship for a guy who may not even lose her in the end because as sad as this may be, in most cases the gf tends to side with her bf, and shuns the other female, even though you may not have been the one who was pursuing the guy in the first place.

I personally think that you deserve better, a 3 corner relationship spells drama for me and they almost always become messy. Every action we take has a reaction, sometimes nothing happens, sometimes something does; there is no way of knowing the outcome, but I guess what you need to ask yourself is, are you ok with whatever happens afterwards? And would you be able to live with it?

I hope my input helped, like I said I cannot tell you what to do, I am far from being a moral compass, but I can advise you to ask yourself the questions I brought to your attention above and hopefully it will help you in making a more informed decision that will work for you…